Tiger mothering is not for me.

Parenting & Musings

I am one of two daughters and was parented pretty strictly by my parents who seemed to be culturally stuck in Korea the year they left, even though we lived in sunny Oz throughout the 80s, 90s and noughties.

I was sorta stuck in the cultural limbo many kids of first generation immigrants find themselves in. Back then I just couldn’t cherry pick the best of what each culture had to offer. So much tradition, familial obligation and getting  straight As just didn’t mix well sleep overs, dating and passing exams “as long as you did your best”. I can now. I’m married, have a child and no longer live under the jurisdiction of mother and father. I’m being a bit facetious, now. It just seems to me that sometimes all that the parents want is to marry you off to a “good” Korean man with a “good” job. But first you must be a doctor/lawyer/whatever mum wants you to be, and then you can marry and then start making Korean babies…

yale

 

Source

Unfortunately for my parents, their first daughter had premarital sex (God forbid!), married a German and ran away to the other side of the world. And ended up bringing a mixed child into this world. Ah, the irony!

The deliciousgrandparents are two of the most incredibly strong, loving and amazing people I know. They have lived through so much and as cliched as it may sound, I really wouldn’t be the person I am without them. I get it that it was just my destiny to be parented the way I was. They did the best they knew how to at the time. I hold no resentment.  However, I would be lying if said that I didn’t sometimes wish to be a part of a liberal and westernised family. Woulda saved a lot of tears, arguments, stress, guilt, emotional eating and more tears.

So, Amazing M! When you read this (if the blog still exists) I want you to ask me if I am letting you live your life the way you want. I want you to ask me if I am encouraging you to follow your bliss. And I want you to tell me to stop if I start to pressurise you Tiger Mother Style.

P.S. this is my 100th blog post!! I am so chuffed to have reached this milestone.

P.P.S delicioussister, you are an amazing, super, fabulous, beautiful person. I hold M hostage until you do what you need to do! I love you to the moon and back. Apologies for being a Tiger Sister.

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